


The Past

by Shay_Nioum



Series: Intrulogical (Logan/Remus) [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Apathy AU, Logan is Apathy, M/M, Memory Alteration, Questionable Patton, the dark sides aren't bad, the light sides aren't 100 percent good
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-06
Updated: 2019-08-23
Packaged: 2020-08-10 11:41:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20134882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shay_Nioum/pseuds/Shay_Nioum
Summary: Logan doesn’t recall being Apathy, he can’t remember a single instance in his life where he was the dark side Apathy. As far as he’s aware he’s always just been... Logic, Thomas’ Logic to be more precise. He lives and he breathes as Logic and nothing more.Except...He’s certain that he isn’t supposed to have emotions, that little things like being called stupid and having the word infinitesimal thrown at him aren’t supposed to hurt the way that they do. He’s certain that he was never supposed to feel, let alone everything that he does now. He just doesn’t understand these feelings, not to mention the dreams of a blank white tie that was folded to crisp perfection. He doesn’t understand the dreams in which he stands before Deceit and the others, with such a tiny smile, but a smile nonetheless.He doesn’t understand, why when he looks at his friends... and he feels nothing but fear and anger.





	1. Chapter 1

“Apathy? Apathy move! Come on, get up!” 

He felt Remus’ insistent tugging on his arm as his leg remained twisted and broken, his ragged breathing came out in pain puffs of air as his teeth ground together in a valiant attempt to keep the intense and agonizing pain off of his face. He wouldn’t be going anywhere in the state that his leg was in, he couldn’t even force himself to hobble, let alone make the several yards to the door that led to the common area of the dark sides. Even so, Remus tugged at his arm again, sweat slicking his brow as something akin to terror blazed brightly in his eyes, the creative side had to have known that he was a lost cause… he had to. 

“Come on!” The other side practically begged, his head snapping over from where they had just come gauging to see just how much time they had left before… before it was over. Deceit had managed to slow the others down for as long as he could in his own way, but even so, it would only be a few seconds before they were on them yet again and it would all be over. “Please, come on! I..I…” It was the first time that he had seen emotions like these cross Remus’ face as the creative side stammered and struggled to come up with a solution to get them both out of this predicament, there had always been the usual carefree chaos that seemed to radiate around him like a cotton candy cloud. But this.. this fear that twisted his features, it was unlike anything he had seen before. It was something that he had never wanted to see, not in his lifetime. Remus was desperate, that much was blindly obvious. “I’ll carry you!”

The other side’s hands attempted to curl under him, to lift him up, to carry him away from here like some dashing prince, and to save them both.   
  


It was useless, completely and utterly useless. Apathy knew that, he had always known that for certain. There was no point in the both of them dying, not here.. and most certainly not right now. 

Apathy swatted at Remus’ hands, using what little strength he had left in order to forcibly shove Remus towards the door and to safety. 

“Go!” He ruthlessly barked out the command, and the disbelief that Remus wore on his face, the disbelief of leaving his leader and best friend behind was all too obvious. “Go without me! If they catch you here they’ll…they’ll” 

They both knew what would happen if they caught Remus, they already had Roman, so in their eyes, there was no need for yet another off-brand, foul-mouthed, filthy creativity when the perfect and spectacular Roman was there to solve everything. They would slaughter Remus right where he stood if he didn’t get going, and there would be no hesitation about it either, so long as Roman never found out Remus had gone missing it wouldn’t raise any suspicions and there would be no reason for Roman to panic. Unless it came to either him, Deceit… or the other one. Only they would know what happened to Remus, if they lived, and only they would mourn him. Remus could not be allowed to die here, no matter what. Apathy would not allow it, he would not stand for such a thing to come to pass. 

“GO!” He roared again, his voice making the walls of the mindspace quake, no doubt giving away their position and making their end come all the more sooner than before. He hoped that Deceit was alright, Remus needed at least someone to be with him, or else he’d quickly lose it. “I’ll find you later, go!” 

Remus shook his head desperately even as he slowly backed his way towards the door, leaving just the smallest gap between him and Apathy. “I can’t just leave you, who’s going to watch over us. What if they.. What if they kill you?!” Messy tears streaked Remus’ face, making the messily put on makeup around his eyes streak down his face catching on the peach fuzz around his mouth. He was still so young… so inexperienced when it came to the others. He didn’t know what laid in wait for him.

Something akin to guilt tore at his insides at the lie that he had just spoken, and tears burned at his eyes before he hastily blinked them away, no weakness not now... This would likely be the last time that he spoke to Remus. "Even if I die, I'll always be with you. But you have to go Remus… please."

More tears swept down Remus’ face, but this time.. this time he at least didn’t argue as he turned, not looking back as he ran. The door slammed behind him, sealing him and the others shut behind it, as a sunny… almost blindly so aura burned behind him like a supernova burning up everything around it with little care for what may be living around it. Looking back, Apathy saw the young prepubescent face of Morality staring right back at him with a smile etched onto his face. It was a pleasant smile, at least to those who Morality liked by any means, but to Apathy and the others… It was a smile that screamed danger and everything that came with it. It was a smile… that made the smallest part of himself tremble just the faintest, in fear. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t run, and… he could scream for his family to help him. For once…

He was all alone.

“Are you going to kill me?” He evenly asked, there was no point in evading the question or the answer for that matter. In the end, stalling wouldn’t do him one bit of good, not against him. 

Morality only tilted his head back and laughed, a pleasant laugh that made his insides twist and writhe like he had live snakes instead of intestines. 

“Oh no,” Morality fiddled with the end sleeves of his cardigan. “We’re in need of a new Logic right about now, and honestly…” Morality’s smile gleamed like that of a shark’s. “You fit the bill pretty well, don’t you? You’re smart obviously, with your neato glasses and fancy lookin tie. You’re just missing one thing now…” 

Horror swept through Apathy, or as much as he was capable of feeling. A part of him wished that he had been more selfish, and made Remus carry him. Especially now, as Morality’s hands reached for his head, his fingers burning like that of the brightest fire, scorching everything in their path while leaving nothing in their wake. It hurt… god, why did it have to hurt so damn bad? He held out for as long as he could, to everything, to dear beloved Remus, to Deceit, to his dear brother who he’d forced to go ahead of himself… to everyone as it all faded away. 

“Is the memories...”


	2. Chapter 2

Logan jolted awake from the dream that had seared the inside of his mind with a gasp that sounded all too similar to a strangled sob, his sweaty locks stuck to his forehead even as the chill raced down his spine like someone had dropped an ice cube down his shirt. Every breath was a struggle as he openly wheezed, curling up his legs up to his chest before resting his head against his knees. The attempt to stabilize his breathing was an arduous one as the seconds ticked by into minutes, his lungs felt like something.. or rather someone had an impossibly tight grip on them refusing to let up for even the smallest of a second. 

What was that? Just what in the hell was that?! 

He’d had dreams before, muddled and half-baked as they were, it was always impossible to make heads or tails from them no matter how they left him feeling in the morning. But this… he’d never had a dream that he had seen more clearly.. or felt for that matter. His heart still galloped in his chest, as the sight of Patton’s young face smiling so threateningly at him, as if.. as if he still had a reason to be afraid of Patton in the first place. As if.. as if he was still in danger. 

“Preposterous,” He scolded himself, forcing his legs to lay back down on his bed, or as far as they could stretch given all the books and papers he had laying on his bed. “Patton would never harm me, dreams are just…” Statistically speaking, dreams were always refurbished memories, as old and distant as they were. So that meant…

No. 

Logan roughly shook his head at the mere notion that flitted through his mind, Patton would never hurt him, they had been estranged friends ever since he had been formed by Thomas. The science of dreams was quite sketchy anyways, especially for a figment of Thomas himself. It was most likely that Thomas had merely revamped some memories from an old horror movie or game and added their faces to it, that was it. There was nothing wrong, he was fine and he would continue to be fine, dreams or not. He was safe and sound here, with his family, with the people that cared about h-

A boisterous knock dragged him from his own denial ridden reassuring thoughts, “Loooogan,” Patton’s voice unwarranted or not sent a jolt through the logical side’s stomach, like spaghetti being spun around on a fork. At least, that was until he forced himself to relax at the sound of Patton’s cheery voice. “Time to get up! Breakfast will be ready in ten minutes, I’m making cat-shaped pancakes!” And just like that, the sound of Patton’s feet scurried down the hallways in order to wake the others, and… undoubtedly the Deceit and Remus as well. 

A knot of emotion swelled in his throat. 

Remus…

A tearstreaked face that begged him to move faster, to try and move. A young voice that told him he’d carry him if he had to, that.. that he wouldn’t leave him to die. A voice that howled against a locked door, as the sounds of Apathy’s scr-

Logan fiercely shook his head as he slid his legs off of his bed, “No!” He scowled angrily, determined to shake the dream from him as he summoned his usual clothes, he was going to go down and eat, do his work for today, and put the contents of this foolish dream behind him. He and Remus weren’t friends, Remus had attempted to kill him several times so they couldn’t be further from friends. Unlike Deceit and the others, Remus was a being that thrived purely on chaos there was no way that even if he did consider it, that he’d be friends with the likes of him. He strived around likeminded people, like Virgil or.. or P-

Logan nearly gagged as he tightened his tie so tightly that it nearly cut off his airways for a solid second before he hastily loosened it. 

Perhaps he should forget about work for today, maybe spending a day inside the imagination and giving himself a few hours of rest would clear his head. With the way that his head was situated and pondering right now… he wasn’t likely to get any work done at all if he was worrying so much over some stupid dream. Perhaps some relaxation really would be better for him today, he was ahead in his scheduling after all, and he had earned it after the whole Remus debacle. Maybe a trip to the pond, or even mirror lakes would do him some good. 

“Looogan!” Snapping his head up at the sound of his own name, Logan heaved a sigh as he slipped his shoes on before finally leaving the safety of his room. 

Patton cheery grin sent a spiral of sickness deep into Logan’s core as he stood before the entrance of the kitchen, “Good morning Patton,” He politely greeted the other, even as he felt like choking on his own tongue. How on earth was he supposed to eat when he could barely get a few words out to the moral side? The smile that greeted him, would have at one time made him feel giddy on the inside, or in the very least the slightest bit warm all the way from his stomach to his heart. Now though… with the image of Patton reaching for him, his burning fingertips razing his mind, he felt nothing but feverish and cold all at the same time as he stood before the moral side praying that he couldn’t read the conflicting emotions in his eyes. 

What the hell was wrong with him? 

Ordinarily, he would have helped Patton pass out the plates, staking the funny shaped pancakes just how each of them liked it, he would have stood next to Patton their elbows brushing. But instead… he felt rooted to the spot, feeling that if he moved… he’d either throw up or faint. 

Patton stopped though, his brow worriedly crinkling as his eyes gleamed back at the sight of him just.. standing there and doing nothing. “You okay Logie bear?” The moral side stepped even closer standing so that the tips of his fuzzy bunny slippers were touching Logan’s shoes. It was too close. “You look awful pale today, you didn’t stay up too late last night, did you? Are you getting sick?” And just like that Patton reached forward, his fingers, burning hot with the heat of the sun creeping closer and closer with each second. They were reaching for his head, and.. And…

_Run._ Whispered the voice in his head. _Run before he can catch you, run!_

A rough shoulder collided with both him and Patton before the moral side’s hand could make contact with his face, as Remus’ sarcastically sneering face mockingly smiled back at him. “Whoops!” He cackled, his hand waving at the two of them disrupting the moment between him and Patton with an almost practiced ease that must have been just a little bit rehearsed, it was so on script with something that Deceit would say as well. “Was I interrupting something?” He giggled, as if it was the climax of some romantic movie, and he was the comic relief constantly stopping the two love interests from confessing shit to each other. 

Even so, relief swept through Logan like a tidal wave slamming and destroying tons and tons of built up garbage. It must have shown on his face, or in the very least his eyes as Remus’ giggling stopped dead and his gaze turned almost serious before his eyes darted away from him and Patton. The duke’s lips pressed into a thin line before he pushed past Patton once again, this time seizing plate that only held one pancake and a truly pathetic amount of bacon and syrup on it. Grabbing a plastic fork, as Patton had forbidden him to even think about touching the metal cutlery, Remus paused once again his shoulder firmly but not harshly thumping against Logan’s, further detaching the logical side from Patton’s searching and blistering gaze. 

“Watch it love birds,” He hissed, an unknown emotion coating his voice as he stomped over to the dining table, sitting in the exact spot that he always sat in next to Deceit and Roman. “Don’t you know royalty when you see it?” 

_ Ah, but of course, obviously he needed to line the floors with his blood for Remus to stroll upon. Like true royalty. _

Logan shook his head at the bizarre thought, truly unaware as to where it had even come from as he gathered his own plate before making his way to the table. Except, instead of sitting by Patton as he normally did. Logan firmly situated himself between Roman and Remus, he ignored the utterly thankful look that Roman shot him as they all ate together… or at least attempted to, with Remus’ loud smacking mouth and syrup getting all over the table despite just how little Patton have given him. Remus must have known about the disgusted looks and feeling from the others, because with little to no hesitation his actions only grew more exaggerated and his annoying grating smacking all the louder second by second until it became practically unbearable to listen to. 

And then Remus accidentally elbowed Logan in the chest with a single movement. 

He could tell that it was an accident by the way that Remus’ eyebrows for a brief second sloped downward into worry, and the frown that tugged at his lips. Within seconds, the tense atmosphere at the table shattered, as Roman reached for his sword, a darkened scowl on his lips as if Remus had just horrifically wounded Logan, and the logical side was bleeding out before him. 

A chuckle passed Logan’s lips, and in a single instant, everything and everyone froze. “Careful _Ram_, next thing I know you’ll be aiming to knock off my head guillotine style. I won’t quite forgive you for that one.” He wasn’t entirely sure just where that one had come from, both the nickname that passed his lips as well as the horrific imagery that his words managed to conjure up. And looking at Remus’ face, his open slackjawed mouth that still held his food and the minuscule widening of his equally horrified and shock ridden stormy grey eyes, it was just that alone that told him that he had just said something that left the darker creative side completely and utterly spiraling. He didn't understand the look, or the silent shock written all over Deceit's half normal half-snake face either, as the dishonest side gripped Remus' shoulder so tightly that there wasn't a single chance for him to go and grab his morning star weapon. The both of them wore a look of equal shock, and Logan for the life of him couldn't understand just why that was.

It was a look that didn’t last long.

“What… did you call me?” 


	3. Chapter 3

“I…” Logan blinked in confusion as Patton’s leg accidentally bumped against his own, confusion colored his voice as he struggled for just a second to think back on what he had just said. It was only a few seconds ago, why.. why was it this hard to remember something he had said just a few moments ago anyways? “I said your name did I not?” He questioned, the memory seemingly solidifying in his mind as Patton’s foot rested atop his own. Yes, that was right… he had said Remus’ name, nothing else. Even so, he didn’t understand the looks the both Remus and Deceit wore on their faces, had he said something wrong? Or had he been too playful for the dark side right then, they were different after all. “Would you prefer that I refer to you as your title?” He instead offered, there was no reason to make this even more tense between them all. 

Patton’s foot eased off of his own as Remus’ lips pressed into a thin barely contained line while Deceit redirected his attention back to his food. 

“No,” Remus sourly muttered, his voice taking on an edge of darkness to it, he didn’t look hungry anymore. Instead, he looked… confused and.. and sad, like the creative side didn’t even understand why he was upset in the first place. “No… no, you’re fine to call me whatever you like Logic…” 

And just like that Remus returned to his food. Except for the fact that this time there was no loud smacking, and the other side didn’t shovel the food into his face like he had been doing up until a few minutes ago. He looked almost resigned, holding the look that most people did when returning from a funeral. 

“So,” Patton’s cheery voice popped up distracting from the mood that Logan’s slip up had caused. “What are your plans today Logie? More schedules for Thomas?” Looking back at Patton, Logan didn’t understand the smile that the moral side wore on his face. It looked… real enough, but there was a layer of ice over his eyes that made him hesitate for just a second in his answer. He wasn’t entirely sure what urged him to hesitate in the first place. Maybe it was the fact that Patton’s smile both looked and felt way too sharp and stiff, or maybe it was the insistent drumming of the other’s fingers against the table. Whatever it was… it made him hesitate, and it made his stomach curl up in what could only be described as fear. 

_ Lie _ . The voice in his head begged. _ Lie _. 

He pushed his plate away from him, his half-eaten stack of pancakes forgotten, already mushy from the syrup that he had poured on them. “I was actually planning on doing some research in the imagination,” He began, it was a half-lie technically, and one that he hoped Deceit wouldn’t call him out on. “Thomas has been thinking about volunteering for some restoration processes, so I want to get a good grasp on what that will entail before he begins.” That one was a lie.

But Patton didn’t seem to notice, as the frigid look in his eyes melted, and a beaming smile lit up his face. Of course, he was probably ecstatic that Thomas was going to something morally correct, he always seemed to brighten up when it came to tasks like that. He just had to remember to make Thomas actually consider doing it, or else he’d be toast. 

Roman nudged his shoulder, thankfully taking his mind off of Patton and his odd smiles. “The imagination will be in tip-top weather my good nerd, promise!” Roman beamed back at him, a look of soft warmth that seemed so very different than the moral side’s frozen smile that had only lingered for a few seconds. So with that being said, he excused himself from the table, cleaning his dishes before heading out with his book in hand. 

It would be nice to catch up on some light reading, and maybe even nap for a little while under the maple tree by the pond. He had earned a nice relaxing-

“Shit!” 

The curse ripped itself right from his lips as his foot caught on a bramble, sending him stumbling forward a couple of feet barely catching himself in time before he would have fallen face-first in a neat circle of mud. Since when were there brambles in the imagination? Roman had always kept things neat and orderly just in case one of them came around at night just to walk off some steam, he couldn’t remember there ever being any. This had to have been the first time he’d tripped, let alone almost fallen from one. At least not since… _ Remus _. The dark curl of the creative side’s name sent a foreign shiver through his body as he finally looked up.

He hadn’t noticed it, but leading away from the open sunny path to the pond was one that led… away. Away to what could only be classified as a dark and spooky forest with cobwebs and spiders clinging to every inch of it, this wouldn’t be a place that Roman would have made, and it wouldn’t be a place that the others would have gone to for any kind of reason. So nobody would know what was inside of it, and nobody had any idea of just what Remus created on that side of imagination. He would be the only one to know… outside of Remus, that was. He could write about it, document it, and even… explore it. 

“The road less traveled on…” He mumbled, the path to the pond already losing its charm for him, as he took his first steps towards what could only be considered an actual adventure. “Is the more interesting one.” He didn’t look back as he dropped his book, knowing already that it would reappear in his room without him, he didn’t need it if he was going to be exploring, and he certainly didn’t need the distraction as he got closer and closer to the line that separated Roman’s imagination from Remus’. It was a dark, thick, and visible line that stretched itself on the ground, going on for as far as Logan’s eyes could see in both directions. 

Setting foot on Remus’ land… none of the others would approve of such a thing.

Logan’s foot broke through the thicket as he stepped forward.

The path was barely distinguishable, then again he did suppose that was the point. That was really the least of his worries though, as far out in the distance retched howls could be heard. It was like a banshee screeching mixed with that of a horribly wounded animal, and Logan could only imagine what a creature like that would look like. But nevertheless, he continued his walk alongside the deeply jutting ravine that had a trickling of pitch-black water in the very bottom of it. So far, the ecosystem wasn’t all that different than Roman’s.

It was funny, how the two brothers prided themselves on being so different and yet… their similarities were there for those who looked deep enough to-

“What the fuck are YOU doing here?!” 

Remus’ voice broke his inner musing as he appeared quite literally right behind Logan, making him jump in his skin from where he had been teetering on the edge of the ravine. Logan saw himself start to slip before he felt it, as Remus’ face abruptly morphed from anger and annoyance, to full-on horror as Logan’s feet slipped back. Throwing him into the darkness of the ravine behind him. Remus’ eyes were wide and full of terror as the creative side’s hand pathetically reached out as he surged forward in a valiant attempt to seize the front of Logan’s shirt and stop him from falling to his death. 

His fingers just barely grazed the logical side’s tie a few seconds too late before Logan vanished from his sights. 

“LOGAN!”

And everything went dark, as if he had been swallowed whole by a shapeless living darkness.

_ “Ram… do you ever miss being useful?” The bland voice coming from Logan’s mouth asked, as the misty image of Remus at least ten years younger grew closer and closer before coming to stand before him. The creative side was leaning casually against the doorframe with a.. kind sarcastic and humoring smile curling on his lips. It was so unlike the raw and chaotic look that he constantly wore, it was so… off. _

_ “Oh wow Apie, tell me what you really think,” Remus snorted rolling his eyes at the question before he resumed picking at one of the many spots on his hand. _

_ But that didn’t stop Logan’s body from moving on its own as he stepped forward with little to no fear as he stood almost proudly before the creative side his posture as straight and rigid as ever… maybe even more so than usual. Looking down at himself a pure white tie was strung around his neck, with a perfect knot that didn’t have a single wrinkle, as the rest of his tie laid neatly creased and ironed against his chest that was covered in a pitch-black long-sleeve button-up shirt. Not unlike the one he had been put in for the courtroom session. Except for the fact that this time, there wasn’t an emblem on his chest, in fact, aside from his tie, there wasn’t a single spot of color on him. His professional suit pants were black, as were the polished shoes that stared back at him, gleaming. _

_ “I’m serious,” Once again Remus rolled his eyes, of course, he was always serious. “Do you regret not being able to create with your brother? Do you regret that you were separated in the first place? I know that.. That despite how estranged I am with emotions, I know that being with us is not necessarily the best when it comes to putting out creatively.” A moment of thickened silence passed between them, “For that, I am sorry, if I could change things. I-” _

_ Remus’ expression softened, his dark grey eyes looking at him with something akin to warmth and.. and love. _

_ “Oh Apie,” The creative side draped his hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I know how much you would change if you could, but… you don’t have to. This isn’t your fault. I promise Apie,” _

_ The look of warmth lingered even as the images of the two of them seemed to get dimmer and dimmer, fading with each second. _

_ “Please Remus… you may call me L-” _

“Logan!”


	4. Chapter 4

Logan woke to the feeling of arms encircling him, his body gingerly bobbing to the pace of someone walking, and the smell of smoke, ash, and fire in his nose, along with the faintest whiff of deodorant, that most certainly didn’t smell all that pleasant. But to say that he woke up was a bit of a stretch, as his mind went in and out of consciousness as his sore body rested in the arms of whoever was carrying him, he couldn’t help the tiny sound of pain that left his lips as his head jostled a little. Just to feel the arms holding him tighten almost instinctually as the person kept walking, their fingers digging even more into his arms and legs as if loosening their hold even the slightest little bit meant that he would just cease to be.

Where was he? Where was he being taken? Who was holding him exactly? Had Patton found him? Roman? Virgil? 

“Easy does it,” The surprisingly warm tilted accent graced Logan’s ears, sending Logan internally spiraling in surprise. “I’ve gotcha nerdy wolverine, I know the ride’s a bit bumpy.” Remus for the life of him actually sounded just a little bit sorry as he readjusted his grip on Logan. The world around him was a blur of dark greens and blacks, leaving him unable to truly tell if they were still in the forest or someplace else that Remus had imagined up just for the logical side in question. 

Logan barely paid it any mind though as the back of his head seemed to endlessly ache, begging him to close his eyes and return to unconsciousness. And he did, as he moved his head nestling his face into the surprisingly soft frills of Remus’ shoulder pads as if it was the most casual thing on earth. He ignored the sharp choked intake of breath and stuttering of Remus’ gait that came from the creative side that came from his simple action, just as he ignored how the other held him differently, almost in a way cradling delicately him close to his chest before he began walking again. Instead, he closed his eyes, letting his exhausted and drained mind since back into the darkness, the steady rhythm of Remus’ footsteps eventually fading away as his breathing evened out. 

Within seconds he was unconscious again. 

_“Apie? Apie are you awake?” A finger poked and tickled his side until he finally cracked an eye open, looking back at the other side who had crouched next to his bed an eager but suspicious grin on his face. “You are!” Remus cheered, before lowering his volume as soon as Deceit knocked on the wall, telling him for the fifth time that night to keep it down. _

_“Do I want to know why you’re waking me up at-” A quick glance to the clock told him that it was well past midnight, almost three in the morning at this rate, a weary sigh left him as he scrubbed at his eyes before sitting up and slipping his wireframed glasses on into place. “Three? What could be so important you rascal?” As annoyed as he sounded, there was a slight grin that curled onto his lips, one that Remus easily mimicked as he hopped up onto the bed, sitting on Logan’s feet as he did. _

_There was something clutched in Remus’ hands, a box who’s wrapping had clearly been done by Remus. If the haphazard cuts and pieces of tape sticking out were anything to go by. _

_He tilted his head to the side, “Did I miss something?” He droned, clearly uncertain as to why he was being given a mediocrely wrapped gift at three in the morning. _

_For a split second Remus’ face fell, but it wasn’t a look that lasted long. “It’s for you dumbshit!” The so-called insult rolled right off of Remus’ tongue, but even so, he wasn’t all too bothered by it. Remus’ more harmful insults were the ones that didn’t have a single bit of cursing in them, so this.. this was child’s play. “It’s your birthday! Dee said that you formed today, so… I created you something. Something that you can use every day!” Remus squirmed in front of him, still holding the box before he roughly shoved it onto Logan’s lap, still sitting impatiently on Logan’s legs as he did. _

_Oh. “Thank you,” The words sounded bland, even to him, but regardless of his tone, Remus beamed like sun, his grin lighting up his face. _

_Slipping open the box, Logan felt something inside of him soften as two things rolled out onto his lap. The first being a soft baby blue hat with a little lightbulb patch right on the front, and the second… a white tie that had painstakingly and neatly been rolled up in order to fit into the box along with the hat that Remus had created. He could have easily made a bigger box, but knowing Remus.. and how excited he managed to get over creating things, he hadn’t been too worried about that. In fact, he had probably been excited to create anything at all. The softness inside of him pooled in the bottom of his stomach like a bog puffing out poisonous cloudy columns of gas. _

_“Thank you, Remus, I apprecia-” _

_Before he could get another word of his thanks out, Remus’ arms latched on around his neck, and Logan went stiff before eventually softening into the display of affection. _

_“I love you Apat-”_

“What did you do to him?!” 

Deceit’s voice broke through the haze of Logan’s dreams, as he slowly blinked his eyes open to a cool dark room that surrounded him. He no longer felt the warm arms of Remus holding him, instead, a fuzzy black pillow had been angled perfectly under his head and neck as a thick woolen blanket laid out over the top of him with the edges neatly tucked in under the sides of his body. He had been laid on a couch by the looks of things, a very roomy and big couch considering that it was just Deceit and Remus in the subconscious commons. He had never seen the inside before, considering that Patton had forbidden all of them from entering it. He had only seen the door, from the bottom of the stairwell that looked as if it led into a basement of sorts. 

“I didn’t do this to him!” Logan picked his head up a little more at the sound of Remus’ voice coming from another room. “He fell into the ravine I created, and I couldn’t leave him there for one of my creatures to crack his head open and feast on the inside of his brain like a gooey buffet of blood and-” Logan’s nose wrinkled a little bit at the imagery.

“Okay.” A rough sigh came from Deceit, as he undoubtedly was rubbing at his temples in the exact fashion that Patton did whenever he had to put up with Remus for too long. “We have to get him back to his side though, if he’s gone for too long then Patton…” Deceit’s words trailed off, and as they did Logan forced his tired aching body to sit up making the covers fall away. 

“Where’s my tie?” The logical side mumbled to himself, only now just noticing that it was gone as he stared down at his shirt that had the first two buttons popped off. He’d had it with him when he had fallen right? When he had… Logan’s fingers reached up to scratch at the back of his head, just to pause as soon as his fingers touched the fresh clean gauze that was wrapped around it. Surely he hadn’t hit his head that hard did he? Then again… he had fallen unconscious several times due to the initial impact, especially if those strange dreams were anything to go by. 

“You’re awake!” Remus’ jittery and way too loud broke through his internal musings as he made his way towards the logical side, the smile on his face seemed way too wide and way too fake to be anything real. It almost resembled Patton’s smile, from breakfast earlier that morning, except Remus’ smile did have an air real warmth about it, unlike the cold sharpness of Patton’s. “For a second I thought that you had scrambled your brains like a cracked egg!” Remus chirped with that smile leaning against the side of the couch his hands folded behind his back. “You are alright… aren’t you? No screws loose yet?” Remus’ smile faded just a little. 

Logan didn’t understand the warmth and softness that pooled in his stomach at the sight of Remus standing there, as if he hadn’t just saved him and carried him back to safety to have his wounds dressed properly. He didn’t understand why his heart was thudding in his chest, or even why it felt so hard to swallow all of a sudden. 

“I...” Logan’s fingers itched at the bandage encircling his head, hiding the bruises that rested on his temples. “I feel fine thanks to you, a little sore, but that’s to be expected when I fall into a ravine around the size of Tartarous.” A snort left Remus and before Logan realized it, he had even cracked a slight smile at the noise, “But Deceit is right,” He added, and the air of comfort and familiarity fell away. “I should get going before the others start looking for me and assume the worst about you both holding me here. I do not wish to get you two in trouble.” He honestly said, and from the entrance of the kitchen, Deceit bobbed his head in a nod.

There was a peculiar look in both of their eyes as Logan made it to his feet, a look that made him pause for a second before he approached Remus. 

“Thank you,” He seriously said, holding his hand out to Remus, “For saving me, you didn’t have to, but you did. So, anytime you wish, or any time you want to pay a visit. My room will be a sanctuary.. for both of you. I promise.” 

For a second, it Remus moved his arms a little as they remained behind his back, but eventually, as his entire body quaked and trembled with the typhoon of emotions... He held his hand out. A hand that was covered in small nicks and cuts from when he had climbed down the edge of the ravine in order to retrieve Logan, but even so, he didn’t hesitate to clasp Logan’s hand giving it a firm shake as he nodded his head. It was most definitely a boon that he would use as he watched Logan leave, any safe space inside the others’ areas was a haven for both him and Dee. Right now, there was just the kitchen and the dining room they were allowed to traverse, but that was only with another side watching them. Logan.. Logan had just granted them something special. 

“I’ll see you later,” Logan quirked an odd smile that felt a little weird on his face. “_You rascal_.” 

And just like that Logan was gone, leaving Remus to seize the edge of the couch, his breathing loud in his ears as he brought his other hand from around his back. The hand that had been holding Logan’s missing and shredded tie, in the beginning, he had honestly meant to give it back to Logan. But now… now that the perfect blue had slowly been bleeding away to a pure white color the longer that it stayed within the subconscious… Remus couldn’t give it back. 

Instead, he held it tight, feeling tears prickling the edges of his eyes for the first time in years, and with nothing to hold him back…

He sobbed.


	5. Chapter 5

Rising up into the living room, Logan stopped dead as he looked around at his surroundings, not only was there to greet him.. there wasn't a single person in his line of sight… but from the looks of it, dinner had already been made and the dishes cleaned up in time for everyone to go to bed. Just how long had he been down there, how long had he been unconscious, and… how long had it taken Remus to crawl down and get him out of that ravine? Looking around at the darkened room, and the even darker hallway he didn’t have a single clue. Just from squinting at the ever-present clock on the wall, he was just barely able to make out the time as the little night light that Virgil had plugged in behind the sofa offered him some semblance of light to see with. 

It was… past midnight! 

How.. just how? It had been morning whenever he’d left, the others had still been eating breakfast!

The sledgehammer of shock slammed right into his ribs as he stood all by himself in the dark living room, for a solid moment not even sure what to do other than to go upstairs and curl up in his actual bed and fall asleep once again. Had the others even noticed that he was gone? That he had been gone for an entire day instead of just a few hours? Had they cared at all?

Something foreign clawed at his stomach like a savage animal, threatening to tear him apart where he stood. Why was it suddenly getting so hard to see all of a sudden? Why did his chest hurt so much right now? Why.. why did he feel like…. Why did he feel at all?

_ Why do we feel?  _ Logan felt himself jerk at the whisper of the dead voice in his ears, it was.. it was the very same voice he heard coming through his mouth time and time again in his dreams. It was so.. off and yet so similar to his own, it felt more real than the feelings coursing through him threatening to take him down under.  _ Why do we feel? _ The voice asked again, Logan wanted so badly to answer it.. to have some kind of worthy answer for it that would explain why he of all of the sides felt anything in that one moment. He didn’t know why he felt, and more importantly… he didn’t know why it felt so wrong to feel in the first place. 

Instead of answering the deeply psychological question, Logan resolved to answer his own hurt feelings in the way that most people did. 

As he took the plate of leftovers that had been left out for him in the microwave and warmed them up, determined to take them to his room where he would either spend hours watching documentaries or falling asleep as soon as his belly was full. Whichever one came first, he wasn’t too worried about. Because either way it would end with him getting food and/or sleeping until the next morning, and that was beyond good enough for him as he clambered up each step with a warm plate of food in his hands. God, it was going to feel so good to sink back into his bed, and just relax after the day that he’d had. Tomorrow would be another thing entirely to deal with, but he’d deal with it as soon it got here. No later and no sooner. Until then he could just rela-

“Hello, Logan,” 

Logan felt every inch, every cell, and every organ in his body simultaneously freeze all in one instance at the sound of the voice coming right behind him. The air became trapped in his lungs as his hand remained frozen on his doorknob that he had already started to turn, he could practically feel Patton’s eyes staring into him as he turned his head looking back at the moral side who blankly stared back at him. Something welled up in his throat, clogging his breathing as his hand limply let go of the doorknob. He was… he… was this fear? Was this what fear felt like? Was he scared of Patton? Scared of.. of what about him? 

“Patton,” Logan forced the deadweight of his tongue to move and form the other side’s name, this felt like the only thing he could do with the moral side looking as serious as he did in that one moment. Patton looked… well, he looked serious enough to kill someone, and honestly.. Logan didn’t really want to test that little theory. “You scared me!” A fake smile curled on his lips, small enough that it could easily be read as one of his usual genuine smiles. “You do not normally make a habit of lurching in the darkness, do you? I thought that was Virgil’s occupation.” 

An easy smile smoothed right over the serious expression that had been tacked onto Patton’s face, easing some of the discomforts that had nestled itself inside of Logan’s guts. 

Patton giggled as he waved his hand casually at Logan, “Oh I’m sorry Logie, I just heard some noises and got worried for a second. We haven’t seen you all day now, I had to make Virge go to bed. He wanted to wait up and make sure that you were alright.” Patton’s eyes darted up and circled in on the stark white bandage that was wrapped around Logan’s head preventing the moral side from seeing his injury. “You are.. alright, aren’t you?” Patton’s voice dropped into the whisper, as he inched forward his hands clasped in front of him so tightly that Logan could see his knuckles standing out. 

And icicle froze on Logan’s heart for a second.  _ Charm him, lies aren’t going to work. Charm him! _

A warm laugh bubbled up from Logan’s lips, creeping past the coldness that had settled beneath Logan’s skin. “Are you worried about me Patton? Me?” He teased, watching a light pink settled over the moral side’s cheeks, it almost horrified him that.. that he felt nothing about it. No shame, no guilt, and… and no love towards the sight of the pink blush dusting itself over Patton’s cheeks. There was only one thing that he seemed to constantly feel about Patton when he was around, and that was… fear. “I am well don’t you worry, I took a bit of a tumble in Roman’s forest while reading my book. It was entirely my fault I’m afraid. But I was able to patch it up.” He grinned, it was a smile that felt like melting wax on his face, but he did it anyway. “I just need some rest, and I’ll be in perfect condition tomorrow.” 

An airy laugh left Patton’s lips as the other side’s eyes took all of him in, from the missing tie to the bandage wrapped around his head. Except.. it didn’t feel like Patton was ‘checking him out’ and more like.. like he was looking for weaknesses, flawed in the flesh suit that was Thomas’ logic, as if.. as if there might be something wrong that Patton would need to deal with. 

“Have you been having nightmares?” The question came like a kick to the gut, and Logan forced himself to not change a single thing about his expression, still keeping that damn smile on his face. There was a glint in Patton’s eyes, a look that he ordinarily would have written off as just excitement, but.. but since those dreams, he could only see it as something else. “I heard you tossing and turning last night, so… are you sleeping okay?” 

The question didn’t sound soft, nor did it sound concerned. It sounded… like a probing, like.. like... There might be something wrong with Logan himself if he WAS having these dreams. 

_ Deny.  _

Logan didn’t have any problem with that.

Furrowing his brow, Logan acted as if he was thinking on the subject for a moment as he shifted the dinner plate to his other hand. “No,” He pretended to muse, scratching at his chin with his warm hand, “I don’t think I’ve been having any nightmares..” He mumbled, but not before adding, “I did get a crink in my neck the other day from laying on my side the wrong way, so that’s probably it. It’s impossible to get situated with a pulled muscle.” The tense lines around Patton’s face smoothed out with another smile, were there going to be even more questions? This.. this almost felt like an interrogation, that if Logan showed one wrong move or emotion, then Patton would.. he would… he…

The image of Patton’s hand coming for his head, his fingers burning like the surface of sun unwillingly came back to him, and just like that, the ice that had settled inside of him was back. It clawed at the back of his neck, as his hairs stood up on end, as fear coursed through his blood like a gushing river refusing to allow him to forget what it felt like. 

“Of course kiddo!” A sympathetic smile that felt all too condescending appeared on Patton’s face before the moral side turned to go back into his own room. “Goodnight Logie!” The sound of Patton’s door shutting rattled in his ears, as he mechanically opened his own door before shutting it behind him. 

Within seconds the wrapped up plate of food tumbled out of his numb fingers as his back slid down the door until he was curled up on the floor. His breathing was loud and echoing in his own ears, “What’s wrong with me?!” He gasped out, before clasping his hands over his mouth, his body shaking and rattling like a kettle that was about to go off at any second. “What the hell is wrong with me?!” He asked again, to the emptiness of his bedroom as tears blurred his vision and he clawed at his own legs, burying his face into his knees muffling his sobs as the terror that had gripped him so tightly before finally let him go as soon as Patton was out of sight. He couldn’t help sobbing again, pressing his hand to his wet mouth as he curled up even tighter. “What’s…. what is wrong with me?” 

In the emptiness of his bedroom, there was no answer. 


	6. Chapter 6

There wasn’t much sleep to be had that night, not as Logan had groggily picked himself up from his floor feeling detached from his very body as the tears continued to numbly drip down his cheeks. He barely felt a single thing as he went about picking up the fallen plate that thankfully hadn’t spilled any food, not that he was feeling particularly hungry right now… or feeling anything at all. It was like that one conversation from Patton had stripped everything from him, all of his energy and the energy to care about the fact that he was so damn tired now. He didn’t even bother taking his shoes off as he slumped against the mattress of his bed, barely able to summon enough strength to wrap himself up in his blanket. 

With his face pressed against his blessedly cool pillow, Logan closed his eyes that were still flooded with tears willing sleep to come to him without the extra baggage of dreams. 

If only.

_ “You’re thinking of doing what now?” His arms were crossed as he looked back at the young Deceit, the side who fiddled with his hat refusing to meet Logan’s icy stare. He looked different, different in a way that Logan couldn’t even recall. His caplet was a mere cape that trailed down to the dishonest side’s ankles with a collar that poked up like the most generic of villains. But right now… he looked like a child playing pretend during Halloween, he was far too sickly looking to even appear like he suited such a garb. “Deceit you kno-” _

_ “I know!” Deceit stamped his foot for a second, an angry flush rushing over his cheeks before he looked away as soon as Logan raised an eyebrow at his actions. “I know Apie.. But I at least want to try before I have to give up entirely, they get to be out there! They get to have Thomas loving them and everything! Why aren’t we allowed to have that too? Why can’t I have it? Why can’t Remus have it? Why can’t you hav-” _

_ “Because we don’t deserve it!” Logan harshly cut in emotionless ice coating his words, ignoring Remus’ head poking out from around the hallway corner, watching everything that was happening. “You know damn well why we can’t show ourselves! We are who we are, and nothing can change that! This is not a topic that I want to come back to Deceit, but since you are so keen on bringing it up again… Morality has decreed it that we are wrong. Do you want to argue with him?”  _

_ The color drained from Deceit’s face as the dishonest side’s bottom lip wobbled and his eyes grew glassy and wet. Almost immediately Logan knew he had made a mistake, as Deceit stepped back from him a look of hurt spreading on his face.  _

_ “Maybe you’re just scared of actually trying.” Deceit hissed sourly as he stubbornly attempted to scrub away his tears, and before Logan could so much as reach out to him, the other side jerked back, storming back to his room with a huff and the sound of a slamming door ringing through the subconscious mindspace. The sound made Logan flinch, just the tiniest bit and before he knew it… something splattered against his shoe.  _

_ Looking down, confusion swept through Logan as he stared at the water droplet. But pressing his fingers to his face, a numb horror swept through him and punched him solidly in the gut as soon as he looked back at his fingers and seeing that they had come back wet.  _

_ Was he… crying? _

_ “Apie?” Logan’s head snapped over to Remus at the sound of the other’s voice, he couldn’t understand the wave of emotions that flew over Remus’ face as soon as the creative side’s eyes landed on his face. He didn’t understand what was going through his mind, or what he was even feeling. But he did understand the wild almost feral edge that Remus’ eyes took on as soon as they landed on Logan’s hand, still wet from the tears that he was still crying. He understood just how Remus’ lips peeled back into a snarl, and how his hands clenched into fists. But… that was it, that was all he understood. “I’ll kill him for you,” Remus stalked forward, looking as intimidating as one could in a dinosaur onesie. “I’ll rip off his dick and shove it down his throat, I’ll-” _

_ “Don’t.” That unbearably soft whisper alone was enough to stop Remus dead in his tracks.  _

_ “But Apie,” Remus whined, standing in front of Logan before gingerly raising his hand, wiping at Logan’s cheeks with his sleeve. Leaving only a smear of tears in its wake. “He made you cry.” It shocked Logan, the amount of genuine softness in Remus’ voice, much less the fact that Remus continued to wipe away the tears, no matter how many rained down on Logan’s face. _

_ “It's probably what I deserve.”  _

_ Remus’ face twisted again, a smaller snarl, but a snarl nonetheless curling on his lips as a fire burned in his eyes. If looks could kill, then someone would certainly be dead by now. “Lo-” _

“Logan? Logan, you need to wake up, wake up! You gotta wake up!” 

The logical side in question jerked awake at the feeling of someone hastily rocking his body back in forth, for a split second his arms jerked in front of his face, almost as if on instinct to protect himself from some kind of blow or any kind of harm that would come to him. Just to stop himself dead as soon as he saw Remus’ terrified face peering back at him through the gape in his fingers, the look on the creative side’s face was drawn and worried, and the look in his eyes… it was a look that Logan could only equate to having something that you love torn apart right in front of you in a horrifically slow fashion. 

Sunlight was shining through the windows, and his clock on the nightstand showed that it was already well past midday. He had… slept in. 

Every part of him felt worn out and rough, as if his body had just run twelve miles, while his mind had been forced to take an SAT for every mile that his body ran while having a set of manicured nails raked against his head like a cheese grater. His eyes felt dry and sandpapery, even though his cheeks were as wet as could be. He felt… awful. He wanted nothing more than to go back to the numbness of last night, to feel nothing as he just went about doing everything that he had to do. 

As dry as his eyes were… they had no problem releasing more tears. 

Remus’ expression crumpled, like a tissue that had been dunked in water. “Hey hey hey,” He mumbled, hastily wiping at the tears with his sleeves, smearing the tears all over Logan’s cheeks, the hopeless expression making Remus forget all about the story that he had brought Logan to read, instead making something catch in his throat. “What’s wrong? What happened? Was it a nightmare?” God, if any of the other sides were to hear him talk like this, they would have thought that he had been replaced by an alien or something, or that somehow Logan was… curing him. It was a thought that he swiftly shook away, as he dried the tears on Logan’s face. “What’s wrong?” He gently asked again, as if two weeks ago he hadn’t ripped out Logan’s teeth and shoved them up his nose, and that he hadn’t temporarily killed him. 

He could have stabbed him. He could have bludgeoned him to death with his morning star. He could have replaced Logan’s internal organs with confetti. He could have stabbed him in the heart while looking right into his eyes and-

“I… think I’m broken.” Logan’s whispered words sent everything to a screeching halt, as Remus’ head tilted so hard that the both of them could hear the sharp cracking noise that it made. A cold fury bubbled up inside up Remus. “My apologies,” Logan hastily apologized, batting at Remus’ hands as he attempted to scrub the evidence of his tears away from his face. “You did not visit me today just to have to deal with this, give me a moment and I’ll be more presentable and we can get on with whatever you want to-” 

“Don’t apologize,” The cold fury burned brighter and brighter inside of Remus, who was it? Who was it that was making Logan feel as if he was broken? He would break them, he would break their bones twice over and then again for good measure. Was it his brother? Never knowing when to keep his mouth shut? He’d stitch it for him. Was it Virgil? The traitor? He’d break his legs. Was it...Patton? Something deep roared in Remus’ chest at the thought, he’d kill. He’d kill.. Kill. Kill. Kill. “Don’t you ever apologize for having a reaction to something emotional, ever. Just tell me what’s causing it, I’ll…” 

He’d fix it? No, he’d kill it. 

Logan rubbed at his eyes, as if that would somehow stall Remus and stop him from going at whoever was responsible like a wild beast. “I…” The words stalled themselves even more, because… honestly, how was he supposed to explain this without sounding ridiculous? Dreams were Roman’s department.. and nightmares were Remus’. How was he supposed to explain the feelings that stupid dreams made him feel, how he couldn’t look at Patton without feeling like he needed to run for his life? Who would understand that? “Lately… I’ve been feeling things.” He lamely said, scratching the side of his arm as he looked away, could he have said that in a worse way? What was Remus supposed to get from that? “Bad things, fears that I’ve never felt before.” 

Remus’ head tilted again, as his lips curled back into a snarl. Logan was almost certain that he could see the faintest bit of drool, very much like a dog primed and ready to attack. “Towards who exactly?” 

Shame curled inside of Logan, the name on the tip of his tongue. Did he want to tell? Did he want to set Remus off on Patton? Did he want Patton to get hurt? Or… did he even want someone to know? Did he want a protector? Did he want someone who wasn’t scared of Patton to step in whenever the moral side tried to touch him? Did he.. did he want someone who would listen and understand him and his fears?

“It’s.. it’s Patton.”

Yes, yes he did. 


	7. Chapter 7

As soon as the arms wrapped themselves around Logan’s neck, he couldn’t help but to sink into the hug unconsciously burrowing his face into Remus’ shoulder. Out of everyone who could have hugged him, and out of everyone who could have possibly shown him the slightest bit of comfort… Logan had never expected it to be Remus, had someone told him three months ago that he would be in this situation, he most likely would have laughed in his usual monotone laugh and walked very far away from whoever told him this knowledge. But here he was, his fingers sinking into the fabric of the duke’s shirt as he held the man close, a warm feeling bubbling in his stomach that he didn’t know quite enough about to put a name to yet. 

Was this happiness? Contentment? Or maybe even l- 

No, no it wasn’t any of that, he was just comfortable finally telling someone about the thoughts that had been going through his head. Nothing more. Nothing more… There was no way that Remus would l.. like a light side like him, not in his lifetime. But even so, it was embarrassing how the whine built up in Logan’s throat as soon as Remus moved away, clamping his lips together he remained determined not to let a single pathetic peep past his traitorous lips. Coupled with the embarrassingly pink hue that descended over his cheeks, he must have looked quite foolish indeed.

“Well,” Remus raked his fingers through messy nest pushing the hair out of his eyes aside from that one grey streak that hung down no matter what, the worry draining out of his very bones now that everything seemed to be alright with Logan. His smile seemed off, or as off as a smile from Remus himself could be in any given situation. But even so… “I’d better go and tell Deceit that everything is alright.” 

“What do you mean?” Curiosity colored Logan’s voice as he narrowed his eyes for a second, unable to truly identify the peculiar look in the creative side’s eyes. 

“I wanted to make sure that you were okay.”

Color blossomed over Logan’s cheeks, and if he hadn’t been blushing before, then he most certainly was now. A mixture of shame and mortification stewed inside of him, what exactly was he supposed to say to something like that? How on earth was he supposed to respond to Remus of all people effectively charming him better than Roman and Patton combined in the years that he had spent with them. How would he explain it to the others, when he couldn’t even explain it to himself? He wasn’t supposed to feel this warmth bubbling inside of him, not for Remus. If anything he was supposed to be normal, unflappable, he… He wasn’t supposed to feel. 

Was he? 

“Right…” Logan thickly swallowed as he watched Remus stand, his fingers itched for him to reach out to him, to tug him back by that bright green sash of his, to make him tumble back and catch him off guard. In the end… he didn’t do that though, as he balled up his fist biting his knuckles as the creative side vanished from his bedroom. “Right…” He whispered again, this time just to himself as he sat in the emptiness of his own bedroom, that suddenly felt so much more colder than it should have been. 

_ Coward.  _

He couldn’t exactly argue against that, he very much was a coward. 

Muffling a groan of disappointment in his hands Logan hunched over in his bed, still very much wearing the clothes that he had worn just yesterday during his accident when he should have summoned a pair of new clothes with the knowledge that Deceit was coming by. But shuffling his feet around under his covers, he couldn’t help but to stop dead at the sight of the very thing that Remus had brought with him. It was… a book, although that was being quite generous. If the suspiciously stained stapled together pile of papers, could even be called a book. It looked like a messy version of the book that Roman had created for him for Christmas, minus all of the silly glitter and stickers that had adorned it. In all honesty… it looked like Remus had probably written this thing in his own blood at some point when he couldn’t find a pen. Logan certainly wouldn’t put it past him. 

But even so, with all of that in mind… he picked up the book. The worn edges feeling so startlingly familiar to him, just as the first pages of this “book” felt so familiar as well. It was like.. like looking at something he had only seen in a dream when he was a child, the nostalgia hitting him like blunt force trauma to the chest. His fingers rubbed the worn cover, feeling the material that had been used to make it before he had allowed his eyes to trail along to the bright red ink that stood out against the whiteness of the pages. 

_ ‘To Apie, You don’t have to read this, but I made this story with you in mind. And not in the sexy way, I love you. Love, Ram’  _

Logan’s fingers spasmed and like the plate of food that he had dropped just last night, the book slid limply from his grasp and onto his lap. “He’s not a dream,” The logical side hoarsely whispered to himself, physically able to feel himself getting paler and paler with each second that passed by. “He’s real,” There had only been one instance that Logan had felt like he was going to faint, and in that very moment, he felt it once again as he stared back at the messy lettering written out for someone that had appeared only in Logan’s dreams. His breathing rattled roughly in his chest, as his heart slammed against his ribs like a bird attempting to free itself, and his vision blurred before him like a carousel that was going way too fast to be safe. 

But even so… with trembling fingers, Logan seized the book once again, diving into the story that Remus himself had written for this mysterious… Apie. 

“Are you sure that you want to do this?” To his credit Deceit looked completely at ease as he stood there despite the fact that he had just clearly startled Logan from his in-depth reading that he had been entirely engaged in, his arms crossed defiantly over his chest as a wicked smirk curled on his lips as he looked at Logan’s obvious bedhead and unkempt clothing over with an almost obvious direction of his eyes. “The others might not like it if they knew what you were doing… having us here without them knowing, or able to keep an eye on us.” The dishonest side slunk forward as Remus watched the two, his jaw clenching and unclenching as soon as Deceit’s fingers scuttled their way up Logan’s arms. “You never know, we might try to corrupt you and turn you against them, since that’s what we apparently do. Or who knows, we might just steal you away from them and-” 

“Deceit!” Remus snarled, the jovial attitude abruptly evaporating as if it hadn’t been there in the first place, the duke bared his teeth that gleamed in the lighting of Logan’s room. His eyes held a strange sort of mania to them, one that the logical side couldn’t exactly put a finger one, but one that Deceit knew right off the bat. If the way that he dropped his hand from the logical side’s shoulder was any indication. 

“It’s okay,” Logan didn’t flinch or wince as Remus’ near-feral gaze snapped over to him, he had never felt more calm than he was between the two dark sides. Looking over to Deceit, who’d head dropped towards his chest, something softened inside of his chest. “It’s okay,” He gingerly repeated, raising his hand so that it rested on the dishonest side’s shoulder. “I’m not scared.” He bluntly told Deceit, watching the cocktail of emotions that dizzyingly washed over the other side’s face like paint being washed off of a canvas. “I’m not scared.” 

Anymore. 

An unbearable look of regret and just the purest look of happiness settled in Deceit’s eyes as a tiny smile replaced that cocky smirk that had been on his face, and in that moment… Logan couldn’t help but to recall the Deceit he had seen in his dreams. This Deceit… the one before him wasn’t at all like the sickly Deceit he had seen in his dreams, but he was also.. very much the same, unsure of himself and deeply guilty over something that Logan couldn’t quite place. Nevertheless, with his words alone, Remus’ hackles settled back down as he stubbornly looked away, the air of peace between them all had been returned to its natural state. 

“You two get comfortable,” Giving Deceit a hefty nudge he flashed a smile. “I’ll be right back, promise.” 

He didn’t look back as he brushed past Remus, his nerves once again rattling inside of him as his mind turned back to the very thing that had made him so anxious in the first place. He most certainly didn’t trust Patton enough to ask him, and… there was no way that Roman would give him a straightforward answer without telling Patton about it afterwards. So that left only one person to ask, and it just so happened to be the very person that happened to hate the dark sides and everything that they stood for. 

“Virgil, I need you to be one hundred percent honest with me,” Logan seriously said after he had cornered the anxious side just outside of the living room, his hands were folded behind his back as he stood completely still before Virgil like the executioner of the dead. His face didn’t display a single emotion, other than the dead seriousness that was hidden in his eyes behind his thickly framed glasses. Which seemed to be the absolute worst thing, as Virgil only seemed to grow more and more anxious at Logan’s tone. Wringing his wrists as he looked up at the logical side through his bangs before his eyes darted away into a different direction, he even chewed on his bottom lip but nevertheless eventually nodded anyway. “Why do you know about a side that went by the name of Apie?”

The result of such a question was almost instantaneous. 

As something in Virgil’s expression crumpled almost instantly and for a second Logan almost regretted bringing the subject up, like a soggy napkin in the rain his smile tore to pieces. “I… he..” Virgil choked the words out before roughly running the sleeve of his jacket under his eyes, smudging his eyeshadow in one massive blur in the process. Logan has never seen Virgil come anywhere close to crying before, the anxious side had always been someone who was either as stubborn as a mule or halfheartedly mushy with his emotions. He’d never displayed… this kind of thing before, and it shocked Logan more than he would ever admit. Before he could step forward to place a calming hand on Virgil’s shoulder the anxious side wrapped his arms around himself, looking smaller than ever before. 

“He’s dead,” He whispered, his jaw stiffening as he clenched it. “In high school, Thomas went through a major change, and you know change…” Virgil have a rough and watery laugh, “It's not always received well. A.. a lot of the others faded, and Patton says that Apathy was one of them.” Virgil’s bottom lip wobbled before he roughly bit it forcing the motion to stop entirely, “I was too busy having a panic attack over everything that was happening to even see him off…”

Apathy… was that who the Apie in his dreams was… Apathy?

“Thank you,” Logan kindly said, his voice oozing a kind of softness that Virgil would have ordinarily and instinctively bristled at. “I am sure that recalling this information was hard for you, and I am sorry that I brought up such sour memories. So thank you.” Squeezing Virgil’s shoulder Logan turned away as soon as Virgil mutely nodded his head shuffling back into the living room, his footsteps starting off as slow before soon enough he was rushing up the stairs and into the hallway that led to his room.

His heart was thumping wildly in his chest, despite the sense of overall calm that descended over him like a wet blanket. Behind the door to his room, he could hear Remus and Deceit jovially chattering to one another, but even that couldn’t distract him from the turmoil going on inside of his head. He didn’t even understand why he was having such a hard time grasping this, Virgil had said that Patton had told him, and Patton wasn’t the kind of person to lie about something as important as that. Right? Right?! Not about the death of a dark side during the purge of Thomas’ mind, back when.. When… When had it happened again? He had been there when it had all happened, hadn’t he? 

_ He’s dead. He’s dead. How can he be dead? How... _

_ Apathy. Apathy. Apathy. _

_ Apathy... _


	8. Chapter 8

Logan’s back thudded solidly against the wall in front of his door, as his hands clasped right over where his heart was thudding against his chest like a ravenous animal attempting to break past his ribs. The world in front of him felt disjointed and out of focus, his glasses felt too heavy on his face and his throat felt almost bare to the world without his tie wrapped securely around it. He hated this feeling, this feeling of being trapped when there was nothing but open space on both sides of him, the feeling of not being able to get enough oxygen… just feeling helpless.

He hated it.

He wasn’t supposed to feel these things.

Why.. why couldn’t he remember? That was supposed to be his whole thing, he could remember everything couldn’t he? He could remember exactly what Thomas ate just three weeks, five days, two hours, and fifty-two minutes ago. He could remember it all, so why.. why couldn’t he recall the moment in which Thomas had his break down during his high school years? Why couldn’t he even remember what he had been doing? Virgil remembered it, so… so why couldn’t he? Why was he having such a hard time even recalling what the hell he had even looked like back then?

“What’s wrong with me?” Logan detested the whimper that curled up out of his throat and past his lips like bile rising from the very bottom of his stomach. Curling his arms around himself, he squeezed tightly as his back slid down against the wall leaving him to sit on the floor if that would solve any of his problems. “What’s wrong with me?” He asked again to the empty air as his forehead thudded against his knees rattling the glasses on his face.

The glasses that felt so wrong, too big and clunky too.. too unfamiliar.

Within seconds with a muted snarl Logan ripped the glasses off of his face clutching them tightly in his hand he blindly threw them, not caring one little bit where they ended up. He could faintly hear the plastic clatter against the wall, and the lenses of his glasses break from the impact. The knot in his stomach loosened just a little bit, as if he had taken at least one step in the right direction, one step out of so many that had been walked in the wrong way. Just how many steps would it take to get him feeling like normal, how many steps would it take before he could feel like he wasn’t coming unraveled near the seams of his entire person? How many?

“Logan? Are you… alright?”

The logical side’s head snapped up at the familiar voice, he hadn’t even noticed it when he had been breaking down, but his door had been eased open as Deceit stepped out into the hall. The smirk was entirely gone from the dishonest side’s face, as a look closely resembling concern crossed the other side’s face. His gloves and caplet were gone, leaving Logan to get a good look at the scales and scars that lined Deceit’s hands. He didn’t look for long though, as he turned his eyes back towards the floor looking more interested in inspecting his shoes than the side in front of him. Even so, that didn’t stop Deceit from crouching down before him, and it didn’t stop Remus from peeking around the door clearly interesting in just what was going on.

“Hey,” Deceit reached out, and in the moment Logan’s felt his vision double and blur.

_“Are you alright Apie?”_ _Deceit with his shoulders covered in a thick blanket kneeled before Logan, his sickly expression only looking worse now as he coughed into his elbow his entire body shivering horribly from the cough alone. His voice was horribly scratchy, as he tiredly looked back at Logan. “Is something wrong? I can help you if you want.” _

Shaking his head as a feeling close to terror gripped Logan’s heart his vision cleared, and Deceit… not sickly looking and not covered in a blanket stared expectantly back at him. His lips were pressed into a thin worried line, a look that only grew worse as soon as Logan slapped his hands over his eyes allowing himself the brief respite of complete darkness and not seeing a single thing. It was a childish action, but one that he couldn’t exactly scold himself for as his entire body started to tremble and shake with a force that he had never felt before. He didn’t want to whimper and cry in front of Deceit, his room was supposed to their safe place away from the worries of being judged and ridiculed by the others, and yet… here he was. Tears dripping down his cheeks as he choked on his own breath trying not to sob, he felt so very…

_Weak. _

“Logan?” Deceit gently asked again, coming to kneel right in front of him, his tone so very worried… no more than worried. He had never heard it before, but he was certain that this is what it sounded like whenever Deceit was scared of something… or maybe he was just scared _for_ something.. for Logan.

“I think…” He sniffled, as Deceit’s hands rested on his knees, “I think that I’m going crazy.” He honestly admitted, this voice warbling with the confession. “I can’t.. I can’t remember things that I should, and I.. I’ve been having weird dreams.. dreams aren’t supposed to impact reality. But they are, and I don’t know what to do about it! I don’t even know if they’re real anymore, because..” Logan roughly scrubbed at his eyes, frustration bubbling inside of him like a volcano well past due for an eruption. “Because apparently, the person I’m dreaming about is real! But I don’t remember him! I’m supposed to! I’m supposed to remember everything, and if I can’t remember this then.. then what kind of Logic am I if I can’t even do this one thing ri-“

Before he even knew it, Deceit’s hands had clasped his face holding it perfectly still and forcing him to look right into the dishonest side’s heterochromic eyes no matter how he tried to glance away. 

Deceit’s ungloved finger gingerly wiped a tear away from Logan’s cheek, “This is not your fault Logan,” He said, looking dead serious as he spoke, “Look at me, none of this… none of what you’re going through is your fault, do you understand? You.. you had no control over what happened, and it was a travesty that it happened in the first place. You didn’t deserve it, you are NOT going crazy. I swear it, I swear it on my life and Thomas’. I promise you.” Deceit’s grip slackened a little bit, as his thumb grazed over Logan’s cheek in a gentle but surprising show of kindness. “It’s okay if you’re scared of this, you don’t know what’s going on, and you’ve been left in the dark. That..” For a moment Deceit shared a look with Remus who had steadily been easing his way out of Logan room, the look that the two shared was something that could only be described as guilt. Pure guilt and shame. “That’s our fault, we should have told you when it became clear that you were remembering. We should have kept you downstairs so that you wouldn’t have gotten so scared.”

Logan didn’t even know it was possible to get even more confused than he already was, and he didn’t know that it was possible to feel even more hopeless about a situation until it was staring him right in the face wearing both Remus’ and Deceit’s faces in turn. But here it was, as his confusion and curiosity mixed like a toxic sludge inside of him as he glanced back and forth between Remus and Deceit.

“I don’t… I…” The sheer helplessness must have shown on his face, “I don’t understand.” He whispered, his knees scrunching up to his chest even tighter than before. What were they talking about, why were they talking as if they knew something that he didn’t? Why were they acting as if he wasn’t supposed to remember the missing blanks from his memory?

What. Was. Going. On?

For a second Remus’ expression crumpled, there was no other way to put the momentous amount of sadness that welled up in the creative side’s eyes in that one moment. He looked like someone had just shot down all of his hopes and dreams before stamping on them and grinding them to dust, and then setting that dust on fire right in front of him. Logan was certain that within seconds, the duke was about to start crying right then and there, and nothing would be able to stop the sopping mess of makeup, snot, and tears that would run down his face in one big chaotic mess.

Remus trembling fists stilled, “Come with me, you need to see something.” The duke instead said, attempting to school his face and stop the influx of tears that Logan had been so sure would happen any second now. Extending his hand he gingerly held it out for Logan, unable to stop his bottom lip from trembling Remus offered an unsteady smile that looked so much more painful than anything that Logan had seen in his entire life. It made the logical side’s stomach twist with something that he couldn’t identify, he wanted nothing more than for that smile to be a genuine one. “You’ll be fine, I promise.”

“Are you certain about this?” Deceit asked as soon as Logan slipped his hand into Remus’, he too looked pained, like they were leading Logan away to some painful kind of death that they would soon regret.

“He deserves to know.”

That was the only thing that Remus said, as creative side started to lead Logan away. Leaving Deceit there to watch them go on their way, towards the door that would lead into their subconscious mindspace. Where Deceit’s room was, where Remus’ room was, and… where Apathy’s room had stayed for the past fifteen years of Thomas’ life, unchanged, and untouched since when Apathy had last been inside of it. Honestly, Deceit didn’t know how Logan would react to everything that he was about it learn, he didn’t even know if Logan would even believe them. He hoped that he would, that Logan would be able to look at them and see.. and see his family that he had forced away from. He didn’t have much hope though… but that was hardly his fault.

However, watching the two of them walk away, Logan’s hand still holding Remus’. He allowed himself a tiny smile, and just the faintest spark of hope to fester inside of him.

Maybe… just maybe. 


	9. Chapter 9

Standing before the bland grey door that was without even a simple name on it, Logan felt something akin to ants crawling up the base of his spine as he looked at the simple word that was spelled out in a neat and somewhat bland font. Apathy. This had been Apathy’s room, it was still here even though.. even though every side that was dead or faded… even though their rooms had faded away along with them. It was unprecedented, the mere idea of a room lasting after the death of aside. Every room, every room without fail had faded away with the death of the sides. Exactly how many times had he seen it happen, and yet here this room was… still standing.

A chill settled down right to the logical side’s core as he glanced up, meeting Remus’ somewhat hopeful expression before the look was instantly dashed as soon as the confusion made itself known on Logan’s face.

“Come on,” The creative side helplessly mumbled, throwing open the door without a single care in the world before strolling in as if he had done this so many times before. His movements were incredibly relaxed as he walked in, flopping on the bed that was covered in a fine layer of dust and cobwebs. The room looked like it hadn’t been used let alone slept in…. in years. The pillows were still messy just as the blankets were, and a pile of clothes still laid on the floor shoved into the corner like it was a makeshift laundry area. There were books everywhere, and- “Does any of this look… familiar?” Remus hopefully asked, his legs bouncing up and down as studied Logan’s every move ever since walking into the room.

The denial was right on the tip of his tongue, but the trouble was… it DID feel familiar. This entire room felt like he had just rubbed aloe on a horrific sunburn that had always itched and burned in a way that he had never noticed until now. It felt safe… it felt like ho- Logan’s gaze stiffened as soon as glanced down at a sole picture frame covered in layers and layers of dust, smudging his fingers over it his movements revealed the faces that laid underneath.

A pale tie, wire-thin glasses, pitch-black clothing, and an expression of blandness that could rival even Logan’s when Roman talked about Disney. He stood next to a much younger looking Remus, a Remus who wore a massive grin on his face, as his arms linked around the other person, hugging him as tightly as he possibly could.

It looked like him. He looked like him. Why did he look like him?

Just like that it became so very hard to swallow, “Remus,” He choked the name out, not even able to look at the creative side in question as he perked up. “What was your relationship with this… Apathy person?” Logan’s voice was hard and cold, he knew it was as cold as ice but… he couldn’t let it be any other way. Not if… Not if he was suspecting what he thought that he was suspecting. “Who was he?” He bit the words out as he set the picture frame back down with a controlled calm so to not accidentally damage it in any way.

Remus suddenly seemed a whole lot more interested in his boots, as he dragged his gaze away from Logan’s. His feet nudging a column of dust bunnies out from under the bed with an almost practiced ease, he looked… uncomfortable.

“He…was my everything, everything and more. He listened when no one else did, and I was always around when the others were happy to leave him alone. I… I…” Remus’ fingers plucked and pinched at his own skin for a moment, his nails digging in until redness seeped under his nails. His bottom lip was quivering, but even so, he didn’t allow himself to cry. “I loved him, like I loved creating and destroying. I loved him like you love that jam of yours, and like how you love space and everything in it. I loved him… even after he left and…” Remus’ eyes nervously glanced up through his lashes to look back at Logan, locking eyes with him for the first time since they had entered the room. “Became you.”

The shock of Remus’ words slammed into Logan like a blunt force trauma as he stumbled back a few steps, until his back was firmly pressed against the dresser.

For a second the logical side choked on his own tongue as his eyes widened incredibly wide as he gawked at Remus, “I am-” He choked again, his breathing coming out in even rasps as his chest painfully clenched, his fingers dug into the material of his shirt right over his heart that was slamming wildly against his ribs threatening to shatter each and every one of them. Before he even knew it he was sliding down, and before he even knew it Remus was crouching right in front of him with his icy cold fingers cupping Logan’s face. “I can’t be!” He gasped out, the words coming out strangled, “I’m not.. I’m Logan.. I’m Logic!” He wanted to wrench his face away from Remus’ hands, to thump his head back against the dresser and render himself unconscious. But at the same time… he wanted to sink into the others embrace, he wanted to be held by nobody else but Remus and hyperventilate in his arms.

“You are,” The creative side looked so sad as he confirmed this, “You were Apathy, his name was Logan, and you are Logan. You might be Logic now… but you were Apathy.” He hurriedly explained, as if the moment that he stopped talking Logan would just fade away into the dust that made up Apathy’s room. “You were changed, you want to know why you can’t remember some things? It was done to you!” Logan struggled to wrench his head away from Remus, so that he wouldn’t have to hear this… any of this. “Listen to me!” His voice cracked openly, as he shook Logan roughly attempting to get the words through his thick skull. “Why are you so scared of Patton?”

Ice coated Logan’s insides.

_“Are you going to kill me?” He could remember asking, willing to accept death if it had meant Remus and the others would be making it out okay. He had already lost so many. Spite. Despair. Carelessness. Depression. Doubt. All of them… all of them gone in an instant, only he, Remus, Deceit, and Anxiety remained. _

_And Morality had already taken Anxiety for himself. Their little stormcloud… gone and hating all of them for no other reason than because it suited Morality. _

_“Oh no,” Morality fiddled with the end sleeves of his cardigan, as if that would distract from what was about to happen. As if that would take away from what he had done. “We’re in need of a new Logic right about now, and honestly…” Morality’s smile had gleamed like that of a shark’s before sinking its teeth into its prey. “You fit the bill pretty well, don’t you? You’re smart obviously, with your neato glasses and fancy lookin tie. You’re just missing one thing now…” _

_“The memories” _

“No!” Logan pitched forward ripping himself out of the terrible memories that he didn’t want, his fingers sinking into Remus’ shirt as he openly sobbed, the influx of emotions tore at his insides as his teeth chattered together. Even the overall calmness of the room couldn’t help him now as he sobbed and sobbed with no end in sight. He didn’t want to believe it, he didn’t want to believe that Patton of all people was capable of any of those things, that he could… hurt him the way that he did. But… as much as he didn’t like it, the memories were there, Remus was here in a bedroom that wouldn’t be here if Apathy was truly dead, and the fact of his feelings even told him… Patton could not be trusted no matter what. Tears drenched his cheeks as he pressed his face into Remus’ neck, undoubtedly soaking the material of his shirt as well as his skin. But right now… he could have cared less.

“Shhhh, shhhhh…” Remus ran his hand up and down Logan’s back, mouthing the words into his hair as he rocked them both back and forth. “Shhh…” He whispered curling as much of himself around Logan as he possibly could in that one moment, feeling nothing more than the shaking jitters as Logan’s sobs eventually subsided. Guilt gnawed at him, he had always wanted Logan to remember who he was, and where he had come from. But this.. seeing Logan completely break down like this… He never wanted Logan to remember if it was going to hurt him the way that it was now, it hurt.. it hurt seeing him this distraught over things that had already come to pass.

But there wasn’t exactly anything that he could do about it, not now.. not now that Logan was already remembering more and more.

Logan sniffled, as he wiped away at his tears, attempting to clear the wetness from his face as he blearily looked up at Remus. Opening his mouth, he struggled to find the words that he needed to say, or just the words that either of them needed to hear. But nothing came out, just what could he say? There was so much that he didn’t understand, so much that he wished that he didn’t remember, and yet… so much that he was glad for remembering. What could he say that would sum up all of that? Logically speaking, there wouldn’t be enough words to sum all of that up, so maybe h-

A tug jolted at the very core of his being.

“I’m being summoned!” Logan blurted the words out, so… as far as the first words went after a major revelation… not too good. “I.. I need my tie, and.. and my glasses.” He rambled, scrambling up from Remus’ intoxicating hold on him, he wanted nothing more than to stay here with him and pretend that the others didn’t exist. But… Thomas was calling him, and he needed to show up looking as presentable as he always did. If he didn’t… then.. then…

In an instant Remus was scrambling away, seizing something from the top of the nightstand by the bed. “Here!” The creative side shoved two items into his hands with an equal amount of importance and urgency that Logan was feeling.

A bright white tie, and a pair of wire-thin glasses stared back at him, the tug at his core pulled even more impatiently. Right now, he was entirely out of options, not that he would turn these items away, not with how gingerly Remus had handled them and not with how well kept they appeared. The white fabric felt almost silky against his fingers, as he slipped the tie around his neck swiftly tying the knot at the base of his throat. Slipping the glasses on, a feeling of sheer relief swept through him. They felt… perfect. Not too big, not too clunky, and most certainly not ill-fitting. It felt… just right, for once in his life, like the ill-sitting suit he had been forced to wear was gone and discarded.

There was an unreadable expression on Remus’ pink stained face, but Logan couldn’t linger on that for too much longer as his core tugged again and again. Thomas was getting impatient, so standing in the middle of the room that felt more like home than anything else… Logan acted.

Seizing the front of Remus’ shirt, he jerked him forward, their lips met in a messy collision, as Logan’s teeth knocked against Remus’ and as Remus let out a startled choking noise. But not before seizing Logan’s cheeks, their lips moving seamlessly against one another as the creative side backed him against the dresser, physically holding him there as Remus nipped at his bottom lip. The sound that Logan made was completely and utterly embarrassing, as his fingers raked through Remus’ hair and if possible that action only spurred Remus on for a few more seconds. As his teeth nipped and nibbled at the side of Logan’s throat, making a warmth cascade through him, unlike anything he had ever felt before.

“Be careful,” Remus hissed into his ear, before giving it a sloppy kiss and backing away.

And Logan… well, Logan didn’t really know how to respond to that, as he mutely nodded before swallowing thickly. It was only when he felt the tug again that he finally sank down, his view of the room and Remus, in turn, fading away as he did. He… he didn’t want to go. He wanted to stay there for hours, or maybe even forever, with Remus, be it resuming their rather heated kiss, or just laying next to one another in an area where they had clearly shared so many memories. He didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to leave. He didn’t want to see the others, let alone P-

“Logan!” Patton’s smile was sharp and cold, as he rose up amongst the others. “You had us worried with how much you made us wait.” The moral side’s gaze froze at the sight of his tie, as his jaw clenched and ground together, if it was possible his gaze seemed that much more frigid at the sight of the tie and his new glasses. Regardless, Logan fearlessly met his gaze, a fire roaring inside of him. “What’s that? A new wardrobe change already? Is everything alright? You look a little… off.”

The truth burned on Logan’s tongue.


End file.
